What resources do I access at 3 am that I don’t seem to have access to at other times of the day? Great question!
What first popped into my head is the fact that when I wake up at 3 am, I am usually “worried” about something. In other words, my gremlins come out at night! During the day, when I am active, I can distract myself from these critters. If I stay busy enough, I don’t have to think about my problems. But at night, my troubles seem to multiply, growing bigger and morphing into insurmountable mountains. At first, anyway. And what I do at night, that I don’t allow myself to do during the day, is let these thoughts run wild. At first it’s a little scary. These problems just seem so huge. My mind races with all the arguments for and against possible solutions. This goes on for hours sometimes (usually 3 hours, to be precise). And then what happens? I’m exhausted and my mind has seemingly exhausted all the possibilities (the same old possibilities I always come up with – none of which resonates or feels right!)
Then what happens? I am so mentally exhausted at that point, that I literally cannot entertain the same thoughts anymore. Finally, I enter that delicious space, just before succumbing to sleep, which allows my subconscious to surface. The “real me” comes out, so to speak. Not all the “shoulds” and “wanna be’s” and judgements and labels. ME – my essence – “the observer” behind the thoughts immerges. “I” come out to play. And just like any kid, I state very clearly what I want!
“I get to be Batman. You’re Robin.”
No cow-towing, no compromising, just pure innocent intention.
I want ___________!
The solution is always so obvious and simple.
So, the next time you can’t sleep because of all those conflicting thoughts reeling in your head, just wait. Don’t resist the process. Be patient. It may take some time. Just listen and eventually,
YOU will come out to play!